At The Mall
Question:
Wow, what a lot of meaty answers to my post. It is interesting to hear how you learned and started this WOE. And your thoughts on the different attitudes of the obese people you know. It’s true we can’t "preace" to people, only give honest answers if they are interested in learning. We low-carbers have an uphill battle in the food industry. The grocery store is devoid of good sugar-free products. This blitz of low fat food and the support in the media is behind (no pun) so much of obesity and poor health. It would be so easy for the food companies to make good tasting things without sugar! –T
Response:
Yep, I’m a newbie…induction 4th day…and thought this was the most appropriate thread to introduce myself with. FYI, I’m 35, at last check 309 lbs. Have been low fat for awhile. Quit smoking about 4 months ago…and I will never, ever go back (excuse me, I’m paying somebody to provide products that DIRECTLY kill me…not anymore)…and of course the weight got even higher. At one time, when very ill from chemical poisoning, I was helped through the Macrobiotic way of eating (now THAT’S restrictive eating…yikes). I believe that food can help us, heal us. Oh, I’ve been fat since I was a small child…my mother believed in ding-dongs in the diet. So why am I 35 and still fat, if I believe that diet can hurt or heal me? One word: fear. Fear of failure, but in the weight loss game, failure is usually an old aquaintance…one I really wish wouldn’t come over to the house but often shows up anyway. Here’s the big one, and perhaps this may hit women the deepest…fear of success. What will it mean to be thin? How will my life change? How will people see me? How will my relationships change? For me the food camaraderie it was akin to the smoking thing. Smoking is a social thing…the smokers get breaks, go out and socialize. A group who is brought together regularly. People use food like that too. What has to change? Here’s an example…my friends, who are at a fairly normal weight, invited me on a trip to New Orleans next month. They excitedly said that they wanted to eat breakfast that morning we got there…guzzling sugar laden chicory coffee and those benyays (or whatever those carbo fried things are called). I said…no…I’m on this diet, I’m serious…none for me. And she says…oh a taste won’t hurt you. I am proud to say I finally laid it on the line pretty strongly, and told her that I don’t intend to die fat, and I don’t want to live fat either. I want a chance to be a thin person. At this point, I’ll do just about anything…this isn’t a drill. I was tired of the brand of relationships I was getting, including the one which just ended…two years, and pretty much no intimacy, little affection. No matter how many times he protested, the bottom line came out to be that he didn’t find me physically attractive (his friend spilled the beans). Why? Mainly because I was fat. Yes, self respect and self love are vital no matter one’s shape, size and condition. I now tell myself the truth *because* I love myself (and I’m sure glad that he’s out of my life…time for a change). I do not want to spend my life simply settling, feeling worse and worse, and glossing it all over. My doctor says she is putting me on blood pressure meds if my borderline pressure doesn’t go down by March 1st. I’m not going on those meds, period. I’m ready to be thin, and the *&^% with the consequences. So maybe I was that obese person at the mall last week. I’m still, just for today, the obese person you see at the mall today…but I’m paying attention now. Oh, and I’m the one making mad dashes to the rest room…that must do something for my physical fitness quotient. <grin I found low-carb basically through my office. Some people around here have been losing alot of weight, and they have a little support group going. I’ve been asking questions for a month or two…and watched. They lose weight, they feel better and better. Now, they’ve become a real support system and reality check for me. Guess I’m now in the "low carb weight loss club." (smile) Between these people and this newsgroup, I’ve really learned alot so far…and have gotten through some of the fear. But I still am scared it won’t work for me, and that all this fat is going to be the death of me. Allright, thanks for listening to me rant…and just so you know…one of those fat people might be watching you really closely. We never, never know the extent to the effect we have on the world…but sometimes I suspect we far underestimate our worth to each other. Blessings…Marsha I just enjoyed reading the thread about standing in the grocery line and it reminded me of something. When I go to the stores now I notice so many obese people. I have such mixed feelings about them. I wonder if they care. <snip
– MO-Marsha low carb since 1/9/00 309/?/150 You know what parts of the above address to remove! ::::::::::::::::::::: "Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?" "That depends a good deal on where you want to get to," said the Cat.
Response:
Welcome to the group. Stick around for lots of great advice and support so that you will see it *can* work for you. — Debbie Cusick "When I get a little money I buy books: and if any is left over I buy food and clothes. " - Erasmus Check out the asdlc FAQ at: http://www.grossweb.com/asdlc
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -But I still am scared it won’t work for me, and that all this fat is going to be the death of me.
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Yes, it is funny how things work! Just got back from picking up my daughter from my parents house (wife had to work late)… My mom just told me that my cousin and his wife had started on the plan my wife and I have been on since July… My aunt had asked us for some information, as my cousin had asked HER what we had been doing to loose so much weight (they had noticed at Thanksgiving time)… We sent some information to my aunt, who passed it along to my cousin and his wife. My mom told me tonight that my cousin’s wife was amazed that her blood sugar was completely under control… I didn’t even know she was diabetic! Turns out she was diagnosed about 18 months ago, and attempting to control it through diet… The levels had been "Creeping up" for the past year, and at her next visit (in February) they were going to put her on oral medication if they hadn’t come down… She was eating exactly what her doctors told her, lots of complex carbohydrates (low glycemic index stuff) and low-fat. After reading Beyond the Zone, and seeing the references for Dr. Bernstein, she began low-carb, and then picked up a copy of Dr. Bernstein’s book… After *1 week* she said her blood glucose has normalized to a fasting level of 90, and even after a meal, it has not gone above 115! (Being extremely concerned about her health, and NOT wanting to take meds for her diabetes, she had enough common sense to get a glucose meter, and had been testing twice a day (before breakfast, and after one of the meals, trying to determine what caused her glucose levels to go up the most), up until she got Dr. Bernstein’s book, now she is testing 4 & 5 times a day… Her "pre-low carb" fasting levels were in the 130 range, and 2 hours after a meal, they were typically in the 200 to 250 range for several hours. The way I understand it (haven’t talked to her yet, myself) when she goes to her doctor next month, she’s going to point-blank ask him what the F*&# he was trying to do to her, having her eat all those carbs 
Knowing her, I’d sure LOVE to be a mouse in the corner of that doctor’s office, because I’m SURE she’ll do just that! LOL Brian – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Fistler said: I just suspect her sister will get fatter and fatter, loading up on junk food, until her oral meds (who’s dosages have been upped 4 times in the past 3 years) can’t compensate for her dying pancreas, and she get’s to start taking insulin injections… (every time she goes to the doctor (same one who told her low-carb was a bunch of crap), her fasting BG is in the upper 100’s… anywhere between 160 & 190… oh man, that’s so sad!! I was diagnosed on Sept 29, ‘99. I’ve reduced and reduced and reduced my meds til I’m almost off them now (I wanted to wait another week before I changed my sig). In just 3 months. I’m estimating that my next HbA1c will be near 7. I don’t feel sorry for her… She’s been told in a compassionate and caring way by my wife, in a private atmosphere, where she had nothing to get defensive about… She’s been offered copies of Protein Power, and even recently Dr. Bernstein’s book, but declines them… I guess, tying back to my opening, it also illustrates that you never know how a person might react to even a small bit of information, if presented to them… That’s they way it worked for me… One radio talk show host was contacted by 1 listener who had been helped… This one host tried it, It took the diabetes diagnosis to cause my mind to be wide open. It scared the f****ing sh** outta me! Although I have to give my doctor a large part of the credit here. He was so uncaring, so uninvolved, so dismissive, and the nurses on the Team were so certain I would be on insulin within 6 months (because I’m "thin", but size was very misleading in my case), that I was forced to look for information on my own. Which lead me to Dr. Bernstein and then to here. Funny how things work. Maybe my rebellious streak is a good thing after all. — diabetes Type 2, 10<bksp<bksp 5 mg glyburide HbA1c: 12.1/?/6.0 doin’ the low-carb, weight-lifting thang
Response:
What a wonderful story. I hope you will post what happened *after* the doctor’s visit! — Debbie Cusick "When I get a little money I buy books: and if any is left over I buy food and clothes. " - Erasmus Check out the asdlc FAQ at: http://www.grossweb.com/asdlc – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – The way I understand it (haven’t talked to her yet, myself) when she goes to her doctor next month, she’s going to point-blank ask him what the F*&# he was trying to do to her, having her eat all those carbs Knowing her, I’d sure LOVE to be a mouse in the corner of that doctor’s office, because I’m SURE she’ll do just that! LOL
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Well, in the particular case, I *know* why her sister gets so defensive… She’s the controlling kind of person who always wants to "make the decisions"… and because her sister (my wife) was/is always popular with almost everyone she meets, because she is so outgoing, her sister wants to "be like her" or more possibly "be her"… If my wife get’s her hair cut a certain way, her sister will do the same, get it colored… same thing… She *used* to comment at every chance she got that "gee, we sure look a lot alike!"… (I’ll admit, their shape was *somewhat* similar at one point, excluding that her sister doesn’t have a bust) but now there is absolutely no way she could even *dream* of saying that… they don’t even look similar in the face any more… See, her sister doesn’t realize that the reason my wife is popular is because of her *personality* not her looks… and the reason that *she* ISN’T popular is also because of her personality… Now, she can’t even say to herself "well, we look alike, why don’t people treat us alike"… And she’ll NEVER have a chance to LOOK like her little sister again, because *she* wasn’t the one who "discovered" low-carb… Brian – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – "What are you so afraid of that you get so defensive?. That should shut her up. — 260/229/150 L.C. since 7/12/99 Brenda ICQ 8636576 You know, after reading some of the suggestions as to what I could have said to that lady, I wish I had it all over to do again… I think I would have tried the "Well, I’ve lost over 70 lbs eating nothing but this food" approach… She’d probably still have "blown me off" but hey, it would have definitely been HER problem then… I’ll remember that, though, because I’ll be eating like this for the rest of my (long, healthy) life, it may just happen again… As to your thought that they might not care… I know that before I found out about Low-carb my attitude was "Hey, I’ve got to die some time, and I might as well enjoy life." It wasn’t until I heard Peskin on the local radio, telling of all the health problems that could be alleviated by low-carb that I really started thinking about "What if I just have a stroke and don’t die, or…." He also made it sound like you got healthy, and the weight loss was just the "side effect"… PLUS it went against EVERYTHING in the "pop culture"… I think it was the combination of the 3, with the most important being "Against the grain", that got me interested in the subject… I’m not really sure how *I* would have reacted if the tables had been turned, and someone had told ME that THEY had lost all that weight eating our WOL (at least in a brief encounter with a stranger, where we likely wouldn’t have talked long enough to get some of the FACTS on nutrition)… I think maybe if they had mentioned a book to go read, I just *might* have looked into it a little… Who knows? I surely don’t know the answer to that. As to feeling funny when seeing an obese person, yes, both my wife and I often comment to each other (VERY quietly, as not to be over-heard) that they should learn about low-carb… Not in a mean way, just stating the facts. The people we’ve found the easiest to "influence" are those we know, or should we say, know us, and know we’ve lost some major weight… Many will ask how we did it, I’ll give the "short" answer "We’ve cut out all processed carbohydrates." If we get an "Oh…, well you look good" we leave it at that… If the person actually seems interested and keeps asking questions, I’m perfectly happy going into detail with them. The strangest thing, though, is going to my wife’s family functions… EVERY person in her family… Both immediate, spouses, nieces, nephews, cousins etc. etc. (with the exception of 3 cousins that I can think of) are obese. We watch them pile their plates full of food, 75% of which are carbs, then go back for 2nd’s and 3rd’s, snack before the meal, and snack after the meal, until most fall asleep in the chairs, floor, couch etc. They’ll occasionally ask "How did you loose your weight", then usually go get another plate of chips, dip, freshly baked buns, corn, potato salad etc. Hey, it’s not our job to force them into a particular diet… It IS our job, though, to make sure our daughter doesn’t fall into the same way of eating that the rest of the family follows… It IS our responsibility to answer questions for our family and friends who *genuinely* want answers. Both of my wife’s parents, and her sister are type-2 diabetics… We’ve talked to her parents, and gave them a copy of Dr. Bernstein’s book, they are currently reading it, and I believe her dad has started to cut back on his carbs… My wife talked to her sister who is very obese… (Wife was cleaning out the final remains of our old clothes… even at my wife’s heaviest, her clothes are about 4 sizes too small to fit her sister.) Her sister said she "told her doctor about it, and he said it’s a bunch of crap"… anyway, now at family functions, if someone asks, and my wife or I start to tell someone, her sister has to pipe up and say "Well, MY doctor told me it’s a bunch of crap, and it’s not healthy to eat that way, they’re just killing themselves"… We’ll point out he lowered cholesterol/triglycerides that are typical on this WOE, and she’ll respond with something to the effect "Oh, they are just making that up to sell books" or "Those people on the Internet aren’t real, you don’t have ANY idea who you’re talking to"… Well, anyway, you get the idea here… There’s a difference between "not believing", "not wanting to listen", and what I call "Actively trying to alter/discredit" the FACTS… The not wanting to listen people, I can identify with… I WAS one of them… Although it wasn’t a conscious effort to not listen, just nobody ever gave me the FACTS to get me interested… The not believing, I have a little harder time with, because being a very analytical person, I have a little easier time "fitting the pieces" together, especially if based on science… It’s a little hard for me to comprehend how some people can just be so damn dense and not see the LOGIC behind something… I’m not necessarily talking health/food/diet, just things in general… Over the years I’ve kind of "lowered my expectations" of what the average person is able to "assimilate" so it’s doesn’t exactly come as a shock to me. (Please don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to be condescending here… There are lots of ABSTRACT principles *I* have problems comprehending… It’s just that some people are great at logical puzzles, other’s are great at different things… I just happen to fall WAY to the logical side, with little left in the realm of the abstract.) Of course, that leaves the people who actively try to discredit what *I* know to be logical… Those are the people I’ve got the hardest time with… Like my wife’s sister… (Like I said, I’ve come to expect that not everyone I know thinks that same WAY I do… that’s natural, but for someone to be the COMPLETE OPPOSITE, running entirely of "feelings" with absolutely NO LOGIC/SCIENCE behind what they are saying…ohhh.. This little red flag just keeps creeping up in me, higher and higher, wanting to shout "Stop talking about things that you have ABSOLUTELY NO F-ING IDEA ABOUT!, Get a clue!, Do some research!, Stop parroting the same old crap you read about in tabloids!, As stupid as you are, you probably didn’t even get it right when you were asking your doctor about it!" I just suspect her sister will get fatter and fatter, loading up on junk food, until her oral meds (who’s dosages have been upped 4 times in the past 3 years) can’t compensate for her dying pancreas, and she get’s to start taking insulin injections… (every time she goes to the doctor (same one who told her low-carb was a bunch of crap), her fasting BG is in the upper 100’s… anywhere between 160 & 190… I don’t feel sorry for her… She’s been told in a compassionate and caring way by my wife, in a private atmosphere, where she had nothing to get defensive about… She’s been offered copies of Protein Power, and even recently Dr. Bernstein’s book, but declines them… Well, I’ve rambled long enough… and gotten somewhat off topic… Sorry about that… (I didn’t realize until now that I had written a small novel!), but it does illustrate that some people *will* listen, other’s don’t care, and some absolutely refuse to be convinced, even when all the facts are presented. I guess, tying back to my opening, it also illustrates that you never know how a person might react to even a small bit of information, if presented to them… That’s they way it worked for me… One radio talk show host was contacted by 1 listener who had been helped… This one host tried it, had great results himself, went on to have the author on his program, so many people had great success, requesting to have this author on again, that he became a "regular" every couple month’s… I heard him 3 or 4 times before I just decided "Hey, he’s making sense, I’m going to check this out…" The rest is history (to me). Even if only 1 in 50
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I love this idea. LOL. — Debbie Cusick "When I get a little money I buy books: and if any is left over I buy food and clothes. " - Erasmus Check out the asdlc FAQ at: http://www.grossweb.com/asdlc
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -When I hit goal, I’m gonna have a "Body by Lowcarb" tshirt made up. A nice *tight* tshirt.
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That’s the problem with just a glance. They may indeed care. They may indeed be low carbers themselves. They may be very *successful* low carbers! There are many of us here on the group who are dedicate and long-term low carbers, yet someone who casually saw us in a store would *still* see a fat person, because we started out with tons of weight to lose, so even though we have lost a bunch we are still *fat* because we have a long way to go. I *HATE* to think that people might be feeling sorry for me if they see me, the fat lady, in a store, because I’m trying to do something about it – but the casual stranger who passes me by at the mall has no clue of that. — Debbie Cusick "When I get a little money I buy books: and if any is left over I buy food and clothes. " - Erasmus Check out the asdlc FAQ at: http://www.grossweb.com/asdlc
I just enjoyed reading the thread about standing in the grocery line and it reminded me of something. When I go to the stores now I notice so many obese people. I have such mixed feelings about them. I wonder if they care. If they care, I wish I could tell them how they can change.
Response:
You can never tell by looking at someone if they are gaining, losing, happy or miserable about their size. They could already be on a low-carb plan.
That’s me, I’m still very heavy and on low carb. Last year I lost 37 pounds, but I’m still a long, long way from my goal. If someone came up to me and started telling me about how wonderful lowcarb is, it’d be a waste of my time. And rude, to boot. Not every obease person is unconverted and you can bet that if they want to lose they’ll go through every damn diet they can find, I know I’ve tried loads.
I didn’t, I watched all my friends yoyo up and down on this or that diet. Saying i lost x amount on this plan and it really works only works if the person is receptive and stuff.
When I made my first lowcarb cheesecake after I got my splenda, I had to run down to the store and get the ingredients. I saw a lady in the dairy section, and she looked at my cart, and commented in kind of a whistful way that it looked like I was getting ready to make a cheesecake. I said yes, and we ended up talking for half an hour or more. It turned she, and most of her family were diabetics (so she thought she couldn’t have cheesecake anymore). I ended up giving her info about my diet, told her to go to the library and check out the Atkins book, and see if it made sense to her. She wrote down the title, and took info about the splenda website too. I don’t know how it went from there, but I still think about her, and hope that she’s doing okay. Karen Rodgers please remove the rice from my email address to contact me, thank you
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You can never tell by looking at someone if they are gaining, losing, happy or miserable about their size.
This so true. People upon being informed that they are speaking with someone who has lost a lot of weight seem amazed and don’t believe it. It is as if you should have a visible outline around you showing how heavy you were. A before and after photo seems to be the only proof they’ll accept! — Diva They said, "Let’s have peace" So I had a piece of everything!
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"What are you so afraid of that you get so defensive?. She’s afraid that she’s going to give up the foods that she loves so much and gains so much comfort from, then she’ll find out that this is "just another diet that doesn’t work for her". Her dr., in whom she must have faith, has told her it’s no good. That it will damage her health further, and fail her in the long run. When people hear of the Atkins diet they are scared to death that they will never again eat the foods they love the most. Then they rationalize and tell themselves that they will go back to eating "normally" after they lose the weight. They cannot imagine life without the starchy, sugary stuff. Those of us who have stuck it out for a long time, realize that it is not a hardship, and that most of the time those other foods don’t even enter our consciousness. A woman I work with work started Atkins shortly after I did, lost 30 lbs., regained that plus another 20, and I overheard her today talking about " a new pill coming on the market soon". There will always be people looking for that "magic pill" that will do it all for them. Jo NJ
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You know, after reading some of the suggestions as to what I could have said to that lady, I wish I had it all over to do again… I think I would have tried the "Well, I’ve lost over 70 lbs eating nothing but this food" approach… She’d probably still have "blown me off" but hey, it would have definitely been HER problem then… I’ll remember that, though, because I’ll be eating like this for the rest of my (long, healthy) life, it may just happen again…
I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone diss my groceries (although I *have* had a cashier say, "oh, you two must be on lowcarb!"). I probably wouldn’t feel *any* need to be polite if someone had. As to your thought that they might not care… I know that before I found out about Low-carb my attitude was "Hey, I’ve got to die some time, and I might as well enjoy life." It wasn’t until I heard Peskin on the local radio, telling of all the health problems that could be alleviated by low-carb that I really started thinking about "What if I just have a stroke and don’t die, or…." He also made it sound like you got healthy, and the weight loss was just the "side effect"…
I know I would never have tried lowcarb if I hadn’t been doing research on the internet about how to treat my PCOS without needing to take hormones. And surprise, surprise… my allergies are almost gone, my headaches are less severe and less frequent, my PCOS symptoms are almost entirely gone, and oh yeah, I’ve gone from a size 22 to a size 10 (in jeans, I usually need a bigger blouse size `cuz I’m broad-shouldered & busty). I’m not really sure how *I* would have reacted if the tables had been turned, and someone had told ME that THEY had lost all that weight eating our WOL (at least in a brief encounter with a stranger, where we likely wouldn’t have talked long enough to get some of the FACTS on nutrition)… I think maybe if they had mentioned a book to go read, I just *might* have looked into it a little… Who knows? I surely don’t know the answer to that.
I’ve been "spreading the gospel" to anyone who shows the slightest bit of interest, and whenever I see a copy of Protein Power or Dr. Atkins New Diet Revolution at a used bookstore I sdtop and think whether I know anyone who should have a copy and if so I get it for them. And whenever anyone comments on my weightloss I am more than happy to tell them how I’m doing it! As to feeling funny when seeing an obese person, yes, both my wife and I often comment to each other (VERY quietly, as not to be over-heard) that they should learn about low-carb… Not in a mean way, just stating the facts.
My husband & I are a little meaner, when we see someone who is *very* obese, we’ll whisper "Thank you Dr. Atkins!" to each other. When I hit goal, I’m gonna have a "Body by Lowcarb" tshirt made up. A nice *tight* tshirt. Atalanta Pendragonne Are you dreaming? Are you SURE?
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Brenda very astutely writes: Or maybe they care and cry themselves to sleep at nite cuz they feel that they have done it all and failed…..
Ding ding ding! We have a winner. -Nancy Overheard: "My life has an excellent cast. I’m just not sure of the plot."
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breezed in in a jumentous cloud, plunked a clinquant arse down and You know, after reading some of the suggestions as to what I could have said to that lady, I wish I had it all over to do again… I think I would have tried the "Well, I’ve lost over 70 lbs eating nothing but this food" approach… She’d probably still have "blown me off" but hey, it would have definitely been HER problem then…
Personally, I think it was HER problem to begin with! What is in *your* cart is none of anyone’s business…unless they’re offering to pay for your groceries… As to your thought that they might not care… I know that before I found out about Low-carb my attitude was "Hey, I’ve got to die some time, and I might as well enjoy life."
Mine was, "I’ve tried everything and it hasn’t worked, so I may as well get on with learning to like myself as I am…life isn’t ending cause I’m fat!" And with a little help from my friends, I was actually able to live with that attitude for several years. I had fun, did what I wanted, ate what I wanted, and the fact that I was overweight (well, okay…I wasn’t overweight, more like morbidly obese…) was secondary. Then along came the diabetes diagnosis. Being a nurse and having seen the complications resulting from it, it scared me silly….so I was back to feeling guilty about being fat, wondering how I could lose some weight, wondering if I wanted to put myself through the mental agony of dieting again. It wasn’t until I heard Peskin on the local radio, telling of all the health problems that could be alleviated by low-carb
I had read two or three articles in a row lambasting low-carb diets, Atkins in particular…and I thought, "hmmmm, that’s one I’ve never tried." So I bought that book and he so accurately described me, my symptoms, etc. that I’m convinced this is the way to go. I’m not really sure how *I* would have reacted if the tables had been turned, and someone had told ME that THEY had lost all that weight eating our WOL (at least in a brief encounter with a stranger, where we likely wouldn’t have talked long enough to get some of the FACTS on nutrition)… I think maybe if they had mentioned a book to go read, I just *might* have looked into it a little… Who knows? I surely don’t know the answer to that.
I usually get rather defensive when other people try to tell me how to live…be it regarding religion, parenting, or the food I put in my mouth…so I *know* if this had been foisted on me by someone, I’d probably have told ‘em to go blow… As to feeling funny when seeing an obese person, yes, both my wife and I often comment to each other (VERY quietly, as not to be over-heard) that they should learn about low-carb… Not in a mean way, just stating the facts.
I don’t mean to pick on you here, but I think that sounds terribly arrogant! Presuming things about total strangers, such as that they’re unhappy as they are is just wrong! I get a mental picture of the foodie version of the Church Lady tsk tsking at all those who have not "found the right way." I’m very much a live and let live kind of person…the only person I’m responsible for is me and for me to presume that someone else "should" learn this or eat a certain way… well, I just try not to do that, is all. The people we’ve found the easiest to "influence" are those we know, or should we say, know us, and know we’ve lost some major weight… Many will ask how we did it, I’ll give the "short" answer "We’ve cut out all processed carbohydrates." If we get an "Oh…, well you look good" we leave it at that… If the person actually seems interested and keeps asking questions, I’m perfectly happy going into detail with them.
There ya go…that’s the perfect way to handle it, I think. They’ll occasionally ask "How did you loose your weight", then usually go get another plate of chips, dip, freshly baked buns, corn, potato salad etc. Hey, it’s not our job to force them into a particular diet… It IS our job, though, to make sure our daughter doesn’t fall into the same way of eating that the rest of the family follows… It IS our responsibility to answer questions for our family and friends who *genuinely* want answers.
Yep…that’s how I feel too. If people ask and really want to know, I’ll be glad to share…but I do not intend to be the Great Crusader… <snipt diabetic sister in law I don’t feel sorry for her… She’s been told in a compassionate and caring way by my wife, in a private atmosphere, where she had nothing to get defensive about… She’s been offered copies of Protein Power, and even recently Dr. Bernstein’s book, but declines them…
There’s nothing to feel sorry for her about…it’s her life to live as she so chooses. I have friends who are certain I’m going to fry in hell because I don’t believe the way they do…they’ve given me the spiel, the Book…and still I turn away….sad, innit? <G Even if only 1 in 50 listen to what you have to say and are helped, and 1 in 50 of the people who ask THEM about what they did to get healthy…
Egad! This is starting to sound like an evangelical meeting! :-p Well, maybe by just helping that one person, you might affect the lives of a LOT of people… People who you may meet some day, and they won’t even know that it’s YOU they have to thank… Yes, I wish I could have that grocery store "incident" to do over again! Brian 270/193/181
Went through yesterday with half a cartful of meat, cheese, sour cream, butter, fish, canned sardines and tuna, etc…the only non-protein things were some salad greens, cucumbers and cherry tomatoes….the checkout guy never said a word, nor did the lady behind me in line…which is just the way I like it. Cheryl Started Atkins Induction 01/11/00. Don’t own a scale, don’t know what my weight is starting out, and don’t care. Tried everything else and just wanna feel better.
Response:
I just enjoyed reading the thread about standing in the grocery line and it reminded me of something. When I go to the stores now I notice so many obese people. I have such mixed feelings about them. I wonder if they care. If they care, I wish I could tell them how they can change. Sometimes I feel righteous. Not that I’m better than them, just that I finally got smart and I’m proud that I’ve done the work to shed some pounds.
You can never tell by looking at someone if they are gaining, losing, happy or miserable about their size. They could already be on a low-carb plan. Not every obease person is unconverted and you can bet that if they want to lose they’ll go through every damn diet they can find, I know I’ve tried loads. Saying i lost x amount on this plan and it really works only works if the person is receptive and stuff. Say9ing something to someone cold is a way to frighten people off, like door to door salespeople and herbalife – lol Remember its hard to believe a thin person can possiably know what it feels like to be fat. Before you buy.
Response:
The not believing, I have a little harder time with, because being a very analytical person, I have a little easier time "fitting the pieces" together, especially if based on science… It’s a little hard for me to comprehend how some people can just be so damn dense and not see the LOGIC behind something…
Interestingly enough, when I went to university I did a minor in philosophy, specifically the philosophy of logic and decision theory. Little did I know that NONE of it has any application to discussions with human beings, because logic and decision theory ignores emotions. You analyze options and look at the values of each option taking into account the assigned risk, and select the option with the greatest value. Simple. No decision theorist would argue with you, because you’re right; it’s right there in black and white. Well, once emotion comes into play, logic goes right out the window. As an extreme example, everyone knows that religious belief of God can’t be defended by logic; it’s a matter of faith, and can’t be defended or attacked successfully with logic. Although people have known this for a long time, just about every ‘big name’ philosopher of the Victorian and prior ages has tried to prove the existance of God with logic. They knew darn well on some level of their consciousness that their ‘proof’ was bunk – it can’t be proved or disproved, and yet they fervently believed in their proof and published it. Descartes is a fine example of this. If these great minds, totally immersed in, and sometimes the ORIGINATORS OF logical thought couldn’t divorce their emotions enough to think logically about *every* issue, then it shouldn’t come as a surprise that Joe Average can’t see the forest for the trees on occasion. It’s very frustrating, I know, but all you can do is *politely* refute what she’s saying, and offer to lend her the book and whatnot. Yeah, it sucks, but getting into a battle royal over it would be bad. — Mike Graham WOEful since Jan 7, 2000 320/295/250 6′ tall and 3′ wide (for now) mikegraham at sprint dot ca, Caledon, Ontario, Canada
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – You know, after reading some of the suggestions as to what I could have said to that lady, I wish I had it all over to do again… I think I would have tried the "Well, I’ve lost over 70 lbs eating nothing but this food" approach… She’d probably still have "blown me off" but hey, it would have definitely been HER problem then… I’ll remember that, though, because I’ll be eating like this for the rest of my (long, healthy) life, it may just happen again… As to your thought that they might not care… I know that before I found out about Low-carb my attitude was "Hey, I’ve got to die some time, and I might as well enjoy life." It wasn’t until I heard Peskin on the local radio, telling of all the health problems that could be alleviated by low-carb that I really started thinking about "What if I just have a stroke and don’t die, or…." He also made it sound like you got healthy, and the weight loss was just the "side effect"… PLUS it went against EVERYTHING in the "pop culture"… I think it was the combination of the 3, with the most important being "Against the grain", that got me interested in the subject… I’m not really sure how *I* would have reacted if the tables had been turned, and someone had told ME that THEY had lost all that weight eating our WOL (at least in a brief encounter with a stranger, where we likely wouldn’t have talked long enough to get some of the FACTS on nutrition)… I think maybe if they had mentioned a book to go read, I just *might* have looked into it a little… Who knows? I surely don’t know the answer to that.
I have been in the other persons shoes once. 
) We manage a mini mart/gift store,(like a Country store) that has a litttle bit of everything. ) I don’t actually "work" there except in the summer. But sometimes when my husband is home I will go down to visit the older lady who works there too, who I enjoy having coffee with, One time we were standing behind the counter and this lady came in and just wandered the store for like 10 minutes reading labels etc, (Its not that big of a store) so finally Donna said "Can I help you find something?" And she said" Wellll… Not really, Im just craving something sweet, Ive been on this diet and I’ve lost 17 pounds in 3 weeks etc….." Iwas like WOW!! Thats neat!.. So she told me she was on Atkins. The lady eventually bought a bottled water. ) After visiting with us for about 15 minutes. But what made me decide too, was just the little low-carb interviews I kept seeing on the local news with people, They were acting like it wasn’t healthy, but I thought "Sheesh, they are just eating the food God gave us to eat, and none of the man-made processed stuff, pretty much. What could be wrong with that? so I eventually just bought the book planning to pick a start date afterwards, But I couldn’t wait that long, so I started the next day. ) I could easily write a mini-novel too, so before I do I better quit, lol —
Filed under: PCOS Diet
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